“As the father has loved me, I have also loved you. Remain in my love….no one has greater love than this; that someone would lay down his life for his friends.” John 15:9, 13, HCSB
I am the girl in the meadow, plucking the daisy. He loves me. He loves me not. He loves me. He loves me not…
Where will the petals run out? Will I believe the testimony of a flower? How can I determine His love?
See, my life isn’t going the way I had hoped. I wanted something….desperately. It was a good thing, a pure hope and honest ambition. Life is dousing that spark, and the waves of disappointment make me feel unloved.
“Don’t you love me?” I cry.
His gaze settles unwavering on me, but I hear nothing.
“I don’t feel your love.” I weep again.
Still, that soft look holds steady, but His voice does not fall on my ears.
I’m exasperated now, and in frustration I spit, “Why won’t you speak! How can I know that you love me?”
He smiles, the sad sort of smile, like I’ve injured His heart. His soft voice drifts across my anger. “Beloved, I have shown you.”
“But I want to hear the words.”
“I’ve shown you.” He stretches His hands forward, beckoning me to His arms.
I see the evidence, the scars in His hands, my name engraved there. I look back to his face and there is love in His glistening eyes. I know now, I remember. How foolish of me to seek truth in the passing moments of life. Flowers stretch forth from their stems, bloom, and then die all in a matter of months…why would I discern His love from their fading petals?
“Do you believe me?” He asks.
I crash into His arms. “Yes,” my tears fall, this time without anger, “I believe that you love me.”
Great post! We don’t go with feeling but with fact. We go with God’s Word and that’s that.
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So true, so important to remember, and sometimes so hard! Thanks for stopping by and commenting, Kathleen. 🙂
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Love this! So true!
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Thanks, Janet. Sometimes I have to write out the things going on in my heart…you know how it is!
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An honest post, Jen. I hear you and am there with you. Remaining in his love is the puzzling aspect of that verse for me. The Holy Spirit gives us strength in our weakness, and yet it’s a discipline to keep ourselves aware and receiving of his love. What’s so amazing to me is that Jesus loves us like the Father loves him. That’s too much for my small brain to comprehend! Praying fresh love for you today.
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Thank you, Sondra. Your prayers sprinkle His love on my heart, and remind me that we are never alone in this journey. Bless you, my sweet friend!
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